Fear of relationships is indeed rooted in past experiences, but overcoming this fear is possible, especially if the relationship is based on love. Love is a choice, not a feeling. Remember that associating with someone does not mean losing your freedom and identity, and remember also that not all relationships are doomed to failure. Connecting with someone you love provides you with new ways to grow, individually and bilaterally.
And I always believe that fear of relationships is the greatest limitation in our life, it is what prevents us from blossoming and reaching the fullest of our potentials and energies. Fear is the first enemy. How do we beat it? Discovering his truth and confronting him.
How do you get rid of fear of relationships?
If you fear engagement, ask yourself the following questions:
- Do you think you have nothing to make a serious relationship in your life succeed?
- Are you afraid of your partner leaving you?
- Are you afraid of the unknown?
- Are you afraid of getting hurt by the person you trusted?
- Does the idea of relating to one person for life bother you?
- Is this person right for you?
- Do you and your partner have the same values and priorities?
- Do you communicate honestly?
- Can you, as a couple, solve your problems calmly?
If you answered yes to most of these questions, you are building a solid foundation for a successful engagement. Here’s the mechanism of change that helps you get rid of the phobia of attachment:
- Admit that you suffer from this fear and are not in denial.
- Share your thoughts with someone you trust.
- Find out the reason for this fear in your subconscious.
- Find out the type of this fear
- Talk to your partner about these concerns.
- Give yourself enough time to solve this problem.
- Know yourself well and define your goals and dreams.
- Take the time to know your partner’s vision for the future.
- Talk to a specialist about this.
- Hypnosis is one of the successful treatments.
Ways to overcome fear of relationships
Do not stay idly by and be confident that if you want, you can overcome all fear of attachment, however deeply rooted it may be in yourself. Here are some ways to help you do that:
- Face your fear of relationships to become stronger: As you face your fear, you gain three qualities: strength, courage, and self-confidence. If you encounter anything that scares you and realizes that you have overcome it, you will be free of many fears in your life.
- Facing your fear may be simpler than you think: Often when you decide to confront, you discover that what was frightening you is a big delusion.
- Take practical steps: Inertia breeds doubt and more fear. Don’t wait for the courage to show up. Move because the more you think, the more fearful you are.
- Fear sometimes depends on wrong information: Fear may sometimes arise from a delusion or an inaccurate or illogical interpretation of things. Reconsider the issues that scare you and try to think differently.
- Do not get attached to the illusion of safety: avoiding danger, in the long run, is not safer than facing it. Safety does not exist in nature, and life is a great adventure.
- Be curious: Curiosity overcomes fear because it makes you more open to exciting things in life, so don’t focus on your fears. Curiosity is a habit that you gain with exercise and time.
- Do not separate yourself from the universe: If you see yourself in all things and all things in yourself, nothing will scare you. Whenever something scares you, look for the cause deep within you. Go back to the beginning to find out what created this fear, and break free of the original cause to break free of your fear.
A simple exercise that frees you from your fear
While this exercise may be fun, it can help you identify the causes of your fear and where to start to solve the problem. Come on, do the exercise I did before and it helped me a lot! Hey, don’t start reading the exercise until you get a piece of paper and a pen.
- Write the word link on a piece of paper and draw lines around it connecting it with other words related to your opinion of the topic of the link. You might write the following words: boredom, suffocation, danger … Do not judge yourself for these thoughts. Keep writing whatever words you can think of.
- Draw a circle around the words that make you feel strong. By doing this, you identify your true concerns about the engagement.
- Decide to accept yourself exactly as you are, knowing that you are not abnormal, but your feelings are caused by a wound in yourself.
- Close your eyes and focus on the strong words that you have chosen for some time and see if you remember any incident or situation from the past.
- Try to decide this memory.
- Open your eyes and write some lines about this memory and the decision you made about it.
- Focus on each line you’ve written for a while until the fear of these thoughts begins to dissipate.
- Relax more and more and do not forget to treat yourself throughout this exercise with love, kindness, and total acceptance because these elements are your gateway to growth.