How to Spot the Signs of Gaslighting? The phrase “gaslighting” is derived from a stage play, which was subsequently adapted into a film, in which a husband progressively convinces his wife that her own memory and perceptions are flawed, even leading her to doubt her own sanity, in order to cover up a crime that he has committed.
Since the 1960s, the term “gaslighting” has been used in psychology to characterise a person’s continuous efforts to make another person doubt their own memory and sanity in order to destabilise them and make their views appear to be false.
The phrase is frequently used in the activities of corrupt or propaganda-driven governments or politicians that aim to mislead the public in order to conceal their own actions or remarks.
Although gaslighting is a kind of manipulation in and of itself, an abuser’s arsenal includes a wide range of methods. If you’ve ever been in an abusive or dysfunctional relationship with your partner(s) or family members, you’re likely to recognise some of these characteristics.
How to Spot the Signs of Gaslighting? Gaslighting Tactics
The gaslighter’s basic tactic is projecting their own flaws onto you, and this is one of the most prevalent. It’s a clever method of diverting attention away from oneself, with a hint of sarcasm. Projection entails ascribing all of the abuser’s worst traits to you, and it can be done with such conviction because the gaslighter is speaking from personal experience.
Projecting Their Own Faults onto You
They know how to persuade others with their stories, even if you know they’re not genuine. Finally, you spend so much time and energy protecting yourself that you become oblivious to their other actions.
Confusion will be used to wear you down (And Throw You Off Their Scent)
The gaslighter’s main objective is to make you doubt all you know about yourself. To perform at our best and preserve our mental health, we all require a feeling of steadiness.
They pass themselves off as the worried friend or lover who is simply looking out for you by interrogating you, drawing you deeper into their clutches.
And They may say something abrasive, but then immediately follow up with good reinforcement, producing a push-pull effect.
They Manoeuvre People Against
They Manipulate People Against Gaslighters are experts at pitting people against each other. And They have a good feel of who will stand with them no matter what, as well as whose opinion you appreciate the most.
They’ll use this information to build up what’s known as ‘triangulation,’ in which they’ll include a third person in their talks with you who has no prior knowledge of the issue at hand. And this individual will be utilised to discredit you by implying that they privately disagree with you.
They Will Isolate You from Friends and Family
They Will Isolate You from Friends and Family As a continuation of the triangulation method, they will invert this tactic, placing individuals against you in the imagined sense. They’ll tell you that people are lying to you and that you shouldn’t trust them. They’ll take up residence at the pinnacle of your support system – the one and only.
Common Gaslighting Phrases
How to Spot the Signs of Gaslighting? The following are phrases that you’ll almost probably hear a gaslighter use, but not in this precise phrasing.
It’s You, Not Me (“I Think You Have Issues”) In this case, the gaslighter or narcissist will attempt to redirect all attention back to you. This is the type of projection that we discussed before.
They’ll attempt to persuade you that it’s you, not them, who is the gaslighter and narcissist.
You’re Overreacting This is one of the most harmful phrases, since we don’t want to feel like we’re causing unneeded drama. It produces tremendous self-doubt, allowing you to facilitate the emotional abuse you’re experiencing by further lowering your boundaries.
Why aren’t you able to just let it go?
This expression refers to the condition of befuddlement that the gaslighter will aim to induce in you. They may be abusive to you one day and then appear the next day as if nothing occurred. When you try to bring up the event, they reject it completely.
I Never Said That (You’re Imagining Things) People who have been the victims of long-term gaslighting may begin to doubt their own sanity. Although this may be simple to dismiss in an isolated event, being told you’re incorrect repeatedly might drive you to mistrust even the tiniest of things.