Being surrounded by people who complain all the time exhausts, and can degrade morale and harm us even when the problem has nothing to do with us.
Today’s life is demanding, and in every field, that is why almost everyone ends up complaining about what we have to face.
Even if it is a human and natural reaction that allows us to free ourselves from tension in more or less complicated or painful situations, it is also a feeling that draws us from the energy.
If it is not bad to have empathy and compassion when people close to us are going through a bad situation, listening to those who complain about everything is more harmful than one might think.
The most disturbing thing is that their attitude becomes so poisonous and manipulative that it makes us think that we are insensitive or selfish because we do not want to be where we are.
This is why it is essential to know how to identify them, understand and know the effects of their negativity in our lives and how to react to cope with them.
The profile of people who complain
These people live by refusing the life they have, they always want to position themselves or be the victims, they constantly complain for nothing and above all, they never do anything to change what torments them so much.
Although at the beginning it may seem quite normal to us, with the passing of time, we realize that the complaint is primarily a routine as it is part of the kind of life of the people in question.
It becomes a deliberate or unconscious Act of manipulation, with which the complaining person tries to provoke guilt, solidarity or compassion, almost all the time to not have to assume his own responsibilities.
Then suddenly, we feel that we are obliged to help him to solve his problems or at least be the support of every moment.
The consequences of those who complain about the morale of others and their Entourage
The behaviors of people who complain about everything are so negative that suddenly you start to feel more exhausted than normal.
Even if one has the ability to help or advise these kinds of people, being exposed to their way of being takes away much of our energy.
And even if it’s not easy to notice, our mind suffers from changes because of the emotions that are driven by the condition of the other.
Feelings such as guilt, frustration, and sadness modify processes that release hormones into our cognitive system and increase the risk of having:
- Emotional imbalances
- Difficulties in solving own problems
- The decrease in concentration
- Negative thoughts
What can be done to cope with the behavior of a plaintive person?
In life, everything does not go as we would like, and often we have to face challenges that we do not want and that we do not expect.
However, it is useless to cloister yourself in frustration and bitterness, since these are behaviors that prevent us from advancing.
We cannot want to solve the problems of other people’s lives when we need energy to solve our own.
So here’s how you can accomplish this :
1- take your distance
As far as possible, get away from these people as much as you can, because with their behavior they will try to manipulate you.
The less you give them attention, the more quickly they will understand that you do not want to put your energy into listening to their negative words and thoughts.make it clear to these people that this is their problem
2 -make it clear to these people that this is their problem
Even if you take the time to listen to their complaints, let them know that the problems come from their way of thinking.
Do your best to make the situation as low as possible and advise that person to take steps to solve their problems on their own.
3 – do not show empathy
Since these people have the ability to manipulate with their behavior, it is important to have a shield so as not to show that one is willing to help them at all costs in the face of all possible and conceivable problems.
While it is sometimes inevitable to have empathy, it is essential to control the situation so as not to feel the urgent need to help when the problem does not concern us.
4 – establish healthy limits
You have the right to ask him not to share his complaints and tragedies with you.
If you are tired of listening to negative thoughts all the time, tell that person that you do not like it and that you would rather not be that shoulder on which she usually cries.
Do you have a loved one or a friend who complains all day? It’s time to act!
Avoid getting into their little game because, and there will be a moment when you begin to feel the impact of its negativity on your own life.